The global news cycle has been dominated by one name since June 25, of course: Michael Jackson. Our deepest condolences go out to his family and friends, and especially his three children. What a sad end to a brilliant and troubled life.
But we come here to dissect the King of Pop, not to praise him. More to the point, to take a look at Michael Jackson from a beauty perspective, because it’s hard to think of another person in recent times who better embodied the self-destructive power of a cancerous sense of Inner Beauty. As you know from our many discussions, Inner Beauty is the core of all true beauty, and it’s within our minds and hearts. It’s the most vital aspect of the Beauty-Brain Loop, the interlinked quartet of Inner Beauty, Health, Outer Beauty and Environment that creates every person’s total beauty picture.
The foundation of Inner Beauty is self-love. Call it self-esteem, self-worth or whatever you like, the idea is the same: you must cherish who and what you are and find yourself precious. That’s not to say you can’t and shouldn’t improve yourself, but if you’re healthy that improvement will stem from the desire to be the best person you can be. When self-change comes about as a result of self-hatred, desperation to please others, or the desire to change and leave a poisonous past behind, that’s when it can mutate into something dangerous. We see that regularly in patients who have substance abuse problems. It’s all born of the same impulse, to become someone else, anyone else.
It’s not a stretch to say that the late Michael Jackson was the patron saint of such self loathing. Just look at how he changed physically from his 1979 Off the Wall album to the bizarre and sad years and months before his death. In 1979, we saw a young, slender and handsome African-American man. But over the years, Jackson slowly whitened his skin, shaved down his nose until there was almost nothing left, and seemed not only to want to shed his tumultuous family past but his race, his gender and even his humanity. What was left in his later years was a pale phantasm who rarely went into the sun, wore a surgical mask over his face, and looked more like a figure at Madame Tussaud’s wax museum than the stunning, beautiful young man who brought us Thriller in 1982. Eva lived not far from the Jackson family and witnessed Michael’s overworked childhood and meteoric rise to success. That cold, disruptive upbringing most likely led to an inability to develop a healthy self-esteem.
What was Michael running from? What had corroded his sense of Inner Beauty so terribly that he could not stand to be who he had been born as and seemed to be obsessed with morphing into something new each minute? What had caused him to develop not just body dysmorphia but what could be called “self dysmorphia?” When he looked in the mirror, what did he see? The sad irony is that, even as he became stranger and stranger in what seems to have been a desperate attempt to transform his identity—to be happy, one assumes—popular culture began to see him less as a genius and more as a sideshow. His obvious self-hatred overshadowed and eventually eclipsed his incredible talent. He was a casualty of life, unable to see in himself the beauty and electricity we had seen in him.
The global pop culture machine will mourn for a while. Quick books will be turned out. Commorative DVDs and plates will be stamped out. Spontaneous shrines will linger for a while. Television retrospectives will air and perhaps a tribute concert will be staged. Eventually, something else will dominate the news. But while we won’t ever forget Michael Jackson and his music, we should also never forget his lesson. Success is defined within, not by record sales. If the King of Pop couldn’t find joy and self-love with his riches and fame, no one can. Inner Beauty is more important than money or notoriety.
The first Beauty Prescription Club, named after our book of the same name, has started at Florida State College at Jacksonville, with more to come around south Florida. The club will feature events, activities and speakers designed to promote the idea of the Beauty-Brain Loop and educate women on how they can become their most beautiful inside and out. We’re absolutely thrilled. Huge thanks to Gloria White for creating the charter club from sheer will and determination to succeed!
We don’t want this movement to stop there, however. We would love this to be just the first of hundreds of Beauty Prescription clubs around the country, and not just at colleges and universities, but in private homes and in businesses. Anywhere there’s a group of women who want to look better, feel better and live better, there’s fertile soil for growing a Beauty Prescription club.
What can you do with a Beauty Prescription Club?
Share experiences and beauty tips
Plan activities that foster Health and improve Environment
Discuss principles of the book
Support members through difficult times and encourage beauty-friendly life changes
Raise money for causes that promote whole-woman beauty
Facebook and Meetup.com are excellent places to begin your own Beauty Prescription club. You don’t need a lot to get started. You really only need an understanding of The Beauty Prescription and its message, a place to meet and a group of women who are enthusiastic about participating. You don’t need our permission, but if you launch your own club we would love to find out about it. If you launch your own club, please let us know by posting your news on the Beauty Prescription Facebook page here.
We’re entering the summer travel season, and that means a lot more time in airports, packing luggage while trying to figure out what you can leave behind (answer: always more than you’d like to), and attempting to eat and drink healthy while you’re going 100 miles an hour with your hair on fire. Even with the recession, you’re probably planning on taking at least a scaled-back vacation, probably someplace sunny and warm. And even though there may be relaxation awaiting you, let’s face it: getting to and from your destination can tax even someone with near-perfect, serene Inner Beauty. So, from us to you as we think about our own escapes to some paradise where mobile phones don’t work, some travel tips for keeping staying beautiful everywhere from the rental car desk to a white sand beach:
Take just the essentials. You’re not going to be able to take your entire medicine cabinet, so just choose the skin care products you must have: sunscreen, moisturizer (moisturizer with sunscreen is even better, as long as it’s broad spectrum), cleanser, and some basic makeup like foundation, lip liner, and so on. You’ll have less to carry and spend a lot less time of your valuable vacation in front of the mirror. Plus, fewer items means fewer chances of getting stuck at airport security.
Protect yourself from the sun. We won’t even go into the risks of melanoma; you’ve heard those before, and there’s no more important reason to minimize your sun exposure. But beyond that, there’s the simple fact that if you’re lying on the beach for a week with unprotected skin, you’re doing damage. In the short term, you’re going to burn and peel, and along with being miserably painful that is never attractive. In the long term, you’re damaging collagen and dehydrating your skin so that you’re more likely to develop crepey, leathery skin on your face and chest as you age. Be smart: wear a sunscreen with at least 30 spf, reapply it every 2 hours, wear a sun hat and when you’re on the beach, sit under an umbrella.
Hydrate. The air in an aircraft is less humid than outside air, so it’s a perfect place to start drinking extra water and to keep hydrating throughout your trip. Hydration keeps your digestion consistent, plumps your skin, cools your body when you’re in the sun, and curbs your appetite so you can resist going crazy on your cruise ship’s 24-hour all you can eat seafood and dessert bar.
Bring healthy snacks. My oh my, the things we eat when we’re on the run. We grab a soda at the airport store, a soggy wrap on the plane for $8, a bag of nuts in the destination airport, then a late sandwich or pizza at the hotel, because the restaurant is closed when we arrive. At all adds up to more sodium, fat, and calories than we need, which can mean extra pounds at the end of a vacation, and that’s not good for anyone’s inner or outer beauty. So pack healthy snacks from the start: fruit, nuts, nutrition bars, whole juice (not apple or grape juice, which are packed with sugar), even healthy sandwiches on whole grain bread. You’ll eat better, save money, feel better and look slimmer when you head back home.
Take it all in stride. Inner Beauty may suffer most during travel. Nothing ever goes perfectly: there are delays, baggage problems, botched orders, more delays, and so on. If you go into your trip assuming you’re entitled to have every stage of your journey go perfectly, you’re going to be miserable and make everyone around you miserable. Instead, remember to be Zen about your travels. Accept that some things will go wrong, but keep in mind that they are small bumps on your way to a wonderful respite from daily life. A little perspective will reduce your stress level and help you feel more beautiful when you arrive.
Be kind. We once heard an airline pilot share the key to getting great service at the airport: be kind to the airline staff. When there’s a flight delay or some other problem, passengers inevitably treat airport staff like dirt, call them stupid, shake their fists and so on. What the pilot meant was that being kind—and we mean over-the-top, “Can I get you a drink, you look like you’re having a rough time” kind—to airline gate agents and other people can really help you get where you’re going. But more important than that, it makes you feel better. Why stand around with your teeth clenched getting angry when you can be nice to someone else and make yourself feel wonderful as well?
Unplug. You’re on vacation. The office will function and the world will turn even if you leave your mobile phone, Blackberry and laptop at home. We all work hard 50 weeks a year; for two weeks, we need to focus only on ourselves, on the present moment. Disconnect from the grid and practice mindfulness. Savor the moments of your trip. You might not get another one for a while.
So the news broke this morning that President Obama will nominate Sonia Sotomayor to fill the Supreme Court vacancy about to be created by the retirement of David Souter. Reactions have been all over the board depending on which side of the political aisle you’re on, but we think it’s a thrilling choice for women. Sotomayor, if confirmed, would become only the third woman ever to sit on the land’s highest court, following Sandra Day O’Connor and Rose Bader Ginsburg, possibly the next justice to retire.
What makes this such an exciting choice is that it represents another instance in which a woman is being considered for an imporant position based solely on factors that have nothing to do with her appearance. On the heels of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and Secretary of State Hilary Clinton, that’s extraordinary.
For Sotomayor, the only thing that matters is her legal, judicial and intellectual pedigree, and by any account it is exceptional: rising from a modest upbringing in the Bronx and overcoming diabetes to attend Princeton, graduate from Yale Law School, edit the Yale Law Review and go on to become a New York district attorney. She is largely regarded as the most important Hispanic jurist in the country at this time. Aside from the abortion or gay marriage questions that will be posed by some special interest groups, those are the only qualifications that matter for Sotomayor. That’s marvelous.
As we have said before, intelligence is part of Inner Beauty, which informs and shapes overall beauty. A women like Judge Sotomayor makes us hopeful because whether she is ultimately confirmed or not, her selection sends yet another message to young women that what you achieve in this world is less about how pretty you can make yourself look and more about what you have between your ears, what you accomplish with the gifts you’re given, and most important, what you give back to others. As Obama introduced his nominee, her mother, Celia Sotomayor, sat in the front row of the press room, weeping tears of joy for her daughter. Only she knows all that Sonia has had to overcome to reach this pinnacle.
So this is a day to celebrate. Another woman of incredible substance and accomplishment stands ready to join the ranks of the finest leaders in the country. It’s a truly exciting time to be a woman…and an American. We’ll keep you posted on the comments, attacks, and news that comes up about her progress toward a Senate vote.
There’s an old saying that goes, “It’s an ill wind that blows nobody any good.” Meaning that no matter how dire a situation, there’s almost always someone who benefits. Case in point: this seemingly bottomless economy. Amidst layoffs, a catastrophic foreclosure rate and all the rest of the news that makes us afraid to switch the TV to CNBC, there are people who are doing well. In the beauty sector, it’s the makers and sellers of discount beauty products.
This article from Inc. magazine tells us that while 40 percent of women say they are delaying their purchases of beauty products like moisturizers and cosmetics, one-third are switching to cheaper products, prompted not only by the economy and lower prices but by increasingly common revelations that many less costly products are just as effective as the luxury brands. This new trend, which pundits are calling “econochic,” is paying off big for the makers of low-end beauty accoutrements: one company, Yes to Carrots, that sells via Target, Rite Aid Pharmacy and Walgreens, projects a 30 percent increase in sales in 2009 despite the terrible economy. So we’d suggest that right after “food, water and shelter” we add “foundation” to the list of things we simply cannot live without.
But why? We’re diagnosticians by trade, so we’re always interested in the underlying causes of things, whether it’s a skin condition, emotional trauma or a societal trend. Why should it be that in the worst economic collapse since the Great Depression, so many women refuse to give up shopping for beauty products? In the past, we’ve made the case that it’s about controlling what you can control and keeping self-esteem strong at a time when so much seems terrifyingly out of control. But now we think our continued, stubborn focus on looking our best—at a time when we could easily justify going cold turkey on all beauty products—is also about something else.
It’s about competition.
Of course. As we talk about in The Beauty Prescription, we are wired to regard attractive people more highly than plain people. Study after study has shown that we trust beautiful people more, pay them better, treat them with more respect when we encounter them on the street, and even give them a better shake in the justice system. Good looking men and women get a better deal out of human society, and may even live longer. So right now, with unemployment approaching 10 percent and millions competing for the same shrinking pool of jobs, why wouldn’t women try to give themselves a competitive advantage by looking as great as possible?
We’re not talking about something as shallow as using sex appeal to get a job, though some women may do that. No, we’re talking about leveraging our evolutionary baggage that makes us assume that attractive individuals are smarter, more socially adept, more trustworthy and more capable than people who look ordinary. In a cutthroat economic environment where many people are struggling simply to survive, the edge in appearance gained by using some moisturizer and lip liner—even if it’s a discount brand—can literally be the difference between getting work and paying the mortgage or ending up homeless. Beauty is part of the arsenal of weapons that we use to survive in tough times. It always has been, all the way back to Cleopatra and Helen of Troy.
So if you’re part of that newly invigorated market for discount beauty products, don’t be embarrassed by your penny pinching. You’re actually adapting to the current circumstances better than many women. Because eventually this economy will recover, and it’s the women who have kept themselves looking and feeling great all along who will be on top.
May is National Tennis Month, which means it’s a good time to talk about this wonderful game and how marvelous it is for all aspects of the Beauty-Brain Loop: Inner Beauty, Outer Beauty, Health and Environment. Eva, in particular, has a special interest in this, being an admitted tennis junkie, but we are both big fans of the game and love the fact that it fosters professional female athletes who are as strong, fierce and exciting to watch as men.
The United States Tennis Association is sponsoring the special month to increase participation in tennis at all levels, from community tennis clubs to the professional circuit. All around the country, USTA chapters will be hosting festivals, clinics and tournaments to teach young people the game and encourage adults to get reacquainted with a game they may not have played in years. But to us, tennis is one of the most beauty-friendly of sports. We’ll tell you why, starting with the most obvious stage of the Loop:
Health—Take a look at pro tennis players and it’s obvious that the sport is fantastic for fitness and cardiovascular health. To play tennis for an extended period of time, you have to be fit. You also need to be strong, flexible and quick. Regular tennis encourages physical fitness and delivers an amazing workout. Health as it relates to complete beauty is about vitality and maximizing one’s physical potential. It isn’t about being model-slim, but about being the best you can be. Venus and Serena Williams aren’t built like models; they are powerful athletes. But because tennis has helped them make the most of their physical gifts, they are two of the most stunning female athletes in any sport. Tennis is a wonderful activity for improving the health of the whole body, and health is beautiful.
Inner Beauty—The most important aspects of Inner Beauty are qualities like confidence and self-esteem, and tennis brings these out in abundance. Playing regularly and improving one’s game requires enough discipline and commitment that people who achieve a high level of proficiency usually also gain greatly in self-confidence and a sense of their own ability to overcome obstacles to achieve a goal—the greatest source of self-esteem. Tennis isn’t easy; it’s a blindingly fast game that demands great concentration and skill. Mastering it even at low levels is something that men and woman should be proud of. Regular tennis players that we know tend to be fit and happy with themselves, which makes them more appealing to others.
Outer Beauty—The health-promoting effects of tennis are wonderful for the skin and exterior beauty as a whole. The sport is fantastic for weight control; the average person burns more than 500 calories during one hour of singles tennis. The exercise tightens and tones the muscles, which improves overall appearance. One caveat: you should always wear broad-spectrum sunscreen when playing tennis, because the extended time in the sun can damage your skin.
Environment—Tennis is a communal game that’s played in the social environment of tennis clubs, where people teach each other, engage in good-natured rivalries, and in many cases help their local communities. The environmental aspect of beauty is about relationships in great part, and tennis is the door to many wonderful relationships for many people.
If you don’t play, May is a great time to learn. If you already play, it’s a perfect time to teach someone else how to play and bring a little more activity and health to your world. Find out more information at the USTA website.
Faster than a speeding minivan. More powerful than a bunch of seven-year-olds on Capri Sun. Able to leap through professional glass ceilings in a single bound. You get the picture. In our last post we talked about all the incredible effects that Michelle Obama has had on the perception of beauty in this country, and on ideas about what a woman can be and do. Now we focus on the flipside of women’s empowerment, or rather, over-empowerment. We’re talking about the Superwoman Phenomenon.
This is, at its core, a self-esteem issue: women trying to prove their worth based on their ability to multi-task and achieve as much as men while also filling the traditional roles of mother and keeper of the home fires. It’s as though feminism has come full circle and with, the Law of Unintended Consequences has come into effect as well. For decades or more, many men have defined their self-worth based on their careers, earnings and possessions. It’s the American pastime: showing off how much you make and how much you have. But women, locked out of higher professional positions, based their self-esteem largely on being wives, mothers and community nurturers.
Now, with women climbing the corporate ladder and redefining business and culture as fast or faster than men (Oprah? Michelle Obama?), equality has come full circle and it’s not always pretty. More and more women are being told—and believingt—that in order to be fully realized human beings, they have to “have it all”—be career climbers who still manage to have water births and tend organic gardens. That’s the Superwoman Syndrome: making our self-worth about what we do, not who we are.
Of course, it’s a trap. No woman can do everything. Something always has to give, whether it’s career or children. That’s why you can jump on an online forum about being a working mom versus a stay-at-home mom and watch the sparks fly. The pressure makes us take sides. But it doesn’t have to be that way. There are ways to remain balanced and avoid the Superwoman trap. Here are some ideas we’ve found to be effective (and as doctors and mothers, we’ve used a few of them ourselves):
Ignore the expectations of others. Society tries to force us into roles with passive messages that say, “You’re not good enough unless…” But these are lies. The only voice that matters is the one that speaks to you from inside. Strong self-esteem is in part heeding only the opinions of people you know and respect.
Pamper yourself. Sometimes, you’re going to be going 100 miles an hour with your perfectly done hair on fire. It’s inevitable. When you are, take care of yourself. Exercise. Meditate. Eat right. Take quiet time with friends. Be kind to your body and mind and you will handle stress with far greater success.
Delegate. If your friends kid you about being a control freak, you probably are. Let go of the reins; you don’t have to do everything. Learn to trust others with tasks and spend your time on the things you enjoy the most and the things you’re best at…which often are one and the same.
Reallocate your time. What do you love most about your life? Make that the object of most of your attention. If you’d rather me a mom first and a professional second, find ways to devote more time to family and less to work. That could mean telecommuting or even cutting back hours. You might have to make some choices that are hard in the beginning, but when you’re living the way that brings you joy, multi-tasking will become much easier.
In the end, Superwoman is a myth. We’re all doing the best we can. So maybe the best advice is to forgive yourself and give yourself credit for what you do well. Because it’s probably quite a lot.
This week, the news media has been abuzz with coverage and analysis of Barack Obama’s first 100 days in office. While that’s traditional, we would like to start a new tradition of feting the First Lady after her first 100 days as the nation’s most visible wife and mother. And who better to start with than Michelle Obama? There’s probably never been a woman in a better position to transform the American image of beauty—on the inside and the outside—than the First Lady.
Let’s break it down according to the four stages of the Beauty-Brain Loop, which we introduced in our book, The Beauty Prescription: Inner Beauty, Health, Outer Beauty and Environment…
Inner Beauty: There has never been a first lady in our lifetimes who has been such a powerful person in her own right. Maybe Eleanor Roosevelt was as strong an influence on culture, but she didn’t have Michelle’s style and grace to go along with the strength and resolve. Ms. Obama exudes confidence and a sense of purpose, but it goes beyond that. Perhaps it’s because of her generation: she’s the first First Lady to come of age in the feminist era when it was no longer acceptable for women to smile in the background while their husbands dominated the podium. Were she not Mrs. Barack Obama, Michelle would still be arresting and no doubt leave a big mark on the world.
But as the wife of the president, she has done more to show her Inner Beauty. She has somehow managed to strike the perfect balance between the brilliant lawyer, the career woman driven to bring positive change to the country, and the wife and mother trying to help her family get through the impossible transition into the White House as easily as possible. As her husband was entering the Oval Office, her focus shifted to her daughters: getting them set up in school, getting them a dog, making sure they had time with their father every day at the breakfast table and doing homework. She was a mother and wife first, a First Lady second. Perhaps that’s why, according to America Online, her approval ratings are higher than the president’s. She knows what matters most to her and gives her joy: her family. That’s where her attention goes. She has already declared that much of her attention will go to helping American families—especially military families. Part of her Inner Beauty is knowing who she is, what she is and what in important to her and apologizing for none of it.
Health: One of the first projects Michelle took on was to plant a “kitchen garden” on the White House lawn with the aid of some DC schoolchildren. She said that its purpose, other than to give her family fresh vegetables to eat, was to promote healthy eating and home gardening. Can you imagine Laura Bush or Hillary Clinton down in the dirt planting carrots? Neither can we. The insistence on being her own person, despite what protocol or tradition might dictate, is as much a part of Michelle’s Inner Beauty as her dedication to Health. And after all, her husband is pretty much shattering tradition as the first African-American president.
The First Lady, because she tends to focus on “soft” issues such as school and healthcare, can have a huge impact on these vital areas of our country. It’s great to see Ms. Obama already working on spreading the gospel of health and living a healthy, balanced lifestyle in what can be the world’s most stressful environment.
Outer Beauty: This is the most obvious difference in Michelle versus past First Ladies. She’s not dainty. She’s bold and beautiful. She’s got curves and she’s not afraid to show them. She’s also got biceps and she’s not afraid to display them, either. And of course, she’s African-American. She is already setting a new beauty standard for black women in this country, a standard that implicity says you can be feminine and stylish but still strong, forceful and proud of your heritage.
Certainly, Michelle has set the fashion world on its ear with her bold style, starting with the still-talked about dress she wore on election night. She’s no wallflower, no Jackie O with pillbox hats. The first Michelle Obama fashion book is about to hit bookstores, and she’s all over the covers of major magazines from Vogue and Ebony to Essence and People. But it’s not just her striking looks or sense of bold style that makes her so magnetic, we think. It’s also that she’s so grounded, so clearly happy. Half of her magazine covers are shots with her family, and she clearly loves being a wife and mother. That makes her gorgeous. There are plenty of women in the world who are more physically stunning than Michelle Obama; there are few if any in the public eye who seem so radiantly happy, balanced and confident in their looks and their lives.
That said, she’s also making it more than OK to be a statuesque, curvaceous, toned, strong-boned lady. She’s taking back some of the territory claimed in recent years by the underfed, size zero waif, and that’s just fine by us.
Environment: What could say more about Michelle’s effect on the Environment than the fact that she still has date nights with her husband, even if they are in Prague? The world’s most powerful man and his wife still find time to snuggle over a romantic bottle of wine? OK, it’s a little less romantic when you add all the Secret Service agents, but that’s not the point. The point is, it sends a message: if the president and First Lady can find time in their schedules for some alone time, can’t the rest of us turn off the TV, quit Twittering and sit down over candlelight with the ones we love?
Michelle Obama seems determined to use her place as an icon for women and African-Americans to make the world a better place. Whether that comes as a result of her total devotion to her family, her dedication to healthful living, her style, her work with families or some other project, she is sending a powerful message to the world through her example: no one can define you but you. It’s an incredibly positive message for self-esteem. During the campaign and after, political pundits have tried to define her as an angry black woman, an America hater, someone who defied protocol and so on. Michelle hasn’t cared, and she hasn’t apologized. She has nothing to apologize for, because no woman should ever apologize for takign on the role and following the path that fills her life with love, purpose and joy.
You go, Michelle. We give you an A+ for your first 100 days as one of the defining new icons of beauty. We can’t wait to see what the next three-and-three-quarters (and maybe more) years will bring.
You’ve probably seen her. If you haven’t, go to YouTube now, type, “Susan Boyle” in the search field, and watch her appearance on “Britain’s Got Talent” (the inspiration for “American Idol.” Go ahead, we’ll wait…
Now, wasn’t that amazing? OK, for those of you who haven’t seen the video and are in a situation where you can’t watch it right now (like at work), we’ll recap: Susan Boyle is a 47-year old virgin spinster from a small village in Scotland, and she’s not what you would call a superficially attractive woman. She’s stocky, beetle-browed, has a hairstyle right out of the 1950s TV series “Hazel,” walks strangely, and has a cocky, cheeky attitude that just begs to be made fun of. In other words, in our beauty-driven culture she’s good for only parody, sympathy or outright scorn. That’s how shallow we have become; if you’re not gorgeous, you can’t possibly be talented or worth paying any attention to.
That’s what made her appearance on “Britain’s Got Talent” so amazing. She walked out on that stage and you could feel the stereotyping going on in the minds of everyone from the judges to the folks in the back row: “She’s frumpy and ridiculous, and she has no idea. This is going to be excruciating.” And don’t even get us started on the double standard for men versus women on these talent shows; were Clay Aiken and Ruben Studdard dreamboats? Hardly. But that’s a post for another day.
Clearly, the judges were humoring her, assuming that a woman who looked like Susan and carried herself with such oblivious self-assuredness had no business being in their spotlight. They were going to grit their teeth, let this self-deluding little woman shatter her dreams all over national television and move on.
Then Susan Boyle opened her mouth and started to sing. And she changed. She became beautiful as an incredible voice soared out of that squat, pudgy body. The best part wasn’t watching her sing, but watching the judges’ jaws hit the floor. We were both delighted beyond words as we watched them realize that they had pre-judged this woman’s talent based solely on her looks—that because she wasn’t pleasing to look at, she also couldn’t be stunning to listen to. And they were so, so wrong. She brought down the house with a voice that belonged on Broadway. And it wasn’t a coincidence; search “Susan Boyle Cry Me a River” and you’ll find a recording she did of the torch song standard for a fundraiser in her town. This woman can sing: sultry, plaintive, and gorgeous.
Instantly, the crowd was on her side. No more making fun, no more snickering. Susan Boyle had become beautiful through the power of her voice. The video of her appearance is the most popular clip in the history of YouTube and she’s become an overnight celebrity. Why? Because she shamed us and reminded us. She shamed us because we, too, assumed that this dowdy “cat lady” would croak out a song in a warbly soprano and make a fool of herself, and we assumed that because we equated appearance with virtue and ability, as we’re prone to. But she also reminded us that within every single woman and man, no matter how plain or beautiful, dwells something of incredible beauty: talent, compassion, charisma, something that has the potential to knock people off their feet with admiration. That’s what we call attractiveness. When she strutted off that stage, Susan pulled TV networks and print reporters into her orbit like she was Jupiter, when before they wouldn’t have given her the time of day except to laugh at her.
Susan Boyle’s mind-blowing performance reminded us all that everyone has the power to be attractive and magnetic and earn a standing ovation because of who we are and what we do, not how we look. But it also serves as a marvelous, stirring, tears-in-the-eyes reminder never to underestimate anyone because of their looks. We’re hard-wired to respond to beauty, but we can choose to overcome that wiring and honor the potential of the person within. That’s Inner Beauty…something Susan Boyle clearly has in spades.
Imagine the stereotypical Botox patient. Go ahead. Are you seeing someone from “Real Housewives of Orange County,” a woman whose face is immobile after countless invasive plastic surgeries and who is so obsessed with defying the aging process that she’ll mutilate herself and inject her body with dangerous toxins to avoid a furrowed brow?
That’s the stereotype all right. But it’s false. It’s a phantasm born of a dozen bad reality TV shows. Sure, there might be some women for whom Botox is one part of a shallow, self-absorbed trek into deep denial, but the huge majority of women who get the procedure are normal, healthy people who just want to look better and feel better. Yes, we said feel better. In The Beauty Prescription, we talked a little about research that showed that having Botox treatments actually made women feel more positive. Now there’s more evidence that the phenomenon is real .
Research results published in the March issue of the Journal of Cosmetic Dermatology suggested that based on a controlled study, people who received injections of Botulinum Toxin A (Botox is the brand name) to paralyze the muscles in their brows and make them incapable of frowning actually showed fewer negative emotions and experienced lower levels of depression and anxiety. Twenty-five volunteers participated, and while 12 recieved Botox, the control group got facial peels and other therapies for “frown lines.” After two weeks, all the patients filled out surveys on their emotional states. The patients who got Botox scored much lower for depression, irritability and anxiety.
What we find very interesting is that the Botox patients said their improved mood didn’t stem from feeling more attractive after the treatments. We agree with the researchers who surmised that the effect probably came from a kind of “feedback loop” (our Beauty-Brain Loop in action) in which facial expressions that reinforce positive emotions stimulate more of the same in a person, while expressions such as frowning stimulate anger, fear, irritation and stress. Essentially, when you frown, you might be cueing yourself to feel like there’s something to frown about, which makes you frown more. As goes thy face, so goes thy mood.
This is a small sample size and there’s more work to be done, but we find this research incredibly promising for promoting the idea of holistic beauty. In a holistic system controlled by the Beauty-Brain Loop, how you react to your environment stimulates your inner beauty, which affects how you look physically. Your appearance sparks a reaction from the people around you, who are also part of your environment, and that reaction feeds back to you. Simply put, think beautiful and smile, and you become beautiful. The evidence is piling up that this is so, and it offers wonderful possibilities for women and men to take control of their own internal and external beauty simply by making new, conscious choices for how to view life, people, and the events of the day. Imagine if you could be more beautiful on your own, without injections, by choosing to smile instead of frown.
Either way, Botox or no, it’s exciting. We’ll keep you posted on more research of this kind as it comes along.
